I find my best days are when I feel a sense of order within my schedule, my mind and my environment. To me, organization leads to creativity, compassion, a listening ear, empathy and production. Why? My mind can relax when I feel a sense of stillness. Stillness to me is peace and order. Well, like you, 2020 has had a great time laughing at my sense of peace and order. But, like you, most likely, I’ve had to reevaluate systems that create peace and order. Guess what, it’s not so much about peace and order, but being flexible to change, understanding and finding what works for me personally. Self compassion, in my words is building your own sense of peace and order, but allowing yourself the amount of compassion that leads to your best days.
Back in March, I rededicate myself to wellness. It sounds a little like a baptism of some sort! I made a conscious effort to get to classes; spinning, bootcamp, zumba, yoga. The smorgasbord board of aerobic activity I’d say. There were days when I was at work thinking I don’t want too, but I remembered how good I felt when the class was over. Who really after working all day wants to plank, throw a tire or lift weights. The more consistent I got in doing classes, the easier and more enjoyable they are. What do “they” say it takes 21 days to create a habit. Well, I think it takes a lot more than that. I love the people I go with, location is convenient, the center is awesome, I feel great doing the classes and my workout clothes are comfy. It takes a lot more than 21 days. The discipline of getting to the gym grounds me. Make yourself a priority, it’s not selfish at all because you are investing in your future. Take it one plank at a time!
Yesterday was a fun day of swimming with my 10 year old niece doing a lot of fun pool activities like I was a 10 year old; handstands, jumps, flips, volleyball. So fun. In the water, it’s like we can do it all, suddenly I am Olympic gymnast, not even thinking or afraid of twisting and turning. Just having fun. On the land, it’s a different story. There is something about the water, sun and kids, just being an Olympian in the pool, having fun and not making excuses; I can’t, should I, does this bathing suit fit? Just have fun and be positive even I am ok with not being a gymnast on land, I don’t want to outshine Simone Biles!
I’ll be honest, people tell me “you are so positive”. I try to be, but in my head, there are some crazy conversations going on, ” I don’t know, should I, will it work”? The answer is yes. Yes, if you make up your mind it will and you work at it. Maybe not how you thought, but for the best. Surround yourself with good people, supportive and keep your attitude genuine. Our attitude determines our success. If you keep saying you can’t, you won’t. I said that yesterday trying to get out of a wet bathing suit, I mean the only option was to walk around with my arm in the boob strap, that wasn’t happening.
I remember when I was in elementary school, my teachers would always says positive comments at conference time, but it was always “needs to work on confidence”. How do you do that? It’s not like multiplication that can be practiced. Confidence comes in time, experience and practice. Confidence comes in ignoring negative, selfish comments and believing in yourself. Embracing the moment and believing in what you are doing and aligning it with your passion and values.
As I got out the pool, closing out my Olympic routine for the day, I remembered I signed up for an hour long bootcamp class. What in the world am I thinking? I dragged myself there, did it and left feeling better. It’s not always pretty, but you too can pull yourself out of that wet bathing suit or at least get a work out trying and come through it better.
Makeup, spanx, jewerly, let’s face it even a hairbrush make me feel luxurious, but who wants to squeeze, suck in, take the time, wake up earlier to do it all up only to run around in an Elementary School with an unexpected accessory of markers and white out dolloped on my hands. Spanx, are for special occasions of sucking in when I feel like breathing isn’t a necessity. Really, who wakes up and looks forward to their spanx, not me. Special occasions, like a Wedding and I can guarantee this is only because pictures are being taken and it’s only fair to the Bride her pictures are amazing. Makeup, my dark under eye circles are ever so grateful. Do I do all this stuff? Yes, but why, do I need too on a daily basis, no way. Do I like to wear makeup, there’s something about waking up, dressing up and being ready. In reality, my confidence lies in me, not the spanx, makeup, jewerly, it’s me, being comfortable and secure in who I am, that is priceless and a lot more comfortable to breathe in too! Be who you are and own it, own your strengths, know your weaknesses and work on them. Life is too short to wake up afraid, live it, live your life happy and secure in you because that’s the best kind of beauty there is!
Then, I would think; too good to be true, I don’t deserve this, I feel bad, “they” must think, this is too easy, no way this can be right, I can’t……sometimes, I think we can be accustomed to tragedy, whether personal, social media induced, it becomes a norm because as a society we are driven by fear that turns into fight or flight. It’s human nature. I always wondered why there wasn’t a celebrate or learn option, hence, my point; fear. Fight, flight, celebrate and learn. That was then.
Now, there is no fear, maybe because I had a lot of fear through death, fear that wiped me out into the fight, fight so bad I became physically ill. Now, celebrate; I do deserve this, why not I work hard, enjoy, take care it’s not selfish. Learn. Learn to celebrate, take in, see the good, be grateful, embrace, laugh and don’t feel bad, you deserve this life, God chose you and only gave you one. Celebrate now!