As I looked up at the sky, I thought how awesome. The light of this full moon weaving in and out of the clouds trying it’s best to shine its’ light. Then, it made me think about living through a pandemic and recent news. Sadness, distraught, disappointment, social unrest, sad and disheartening news when we look at social media, news outlets, and unfortunately for some people at times when encountering each other.
When I think back from now until March of 2020, sometimes things seem a blur. That’s not good enough. For me, there are so many blessings during the past year I can reflect on, so many and I’m thankful. However, I find myself taking inventory of what matters and even though we are in a pandemic the blur needs to he refreshed with purpose. This is our reality and how am I keeping purpose?
There are always choices; stay on the sideline or get in the game. I think at some point of the pandemic I’ve been on the sideline getting through a pandemic; going through the motions trying to stay positive. It’s time to get in the game; whether you are the quarterback, goalie, kicker or catcher how will you contribute. Making the effort to cut social media browsing, volunteering in my community, looking into giving reiki at a local organization safely and overall forward thinking. Get in the game safely of course, find your purpose, make a small change and watch it’s domino effect. Yes, sometimes I’ll be cheering from the sidelines sharing the light. Yes, live your life safely, smart during the pandemic, but for me I’m filling the blur with purpose.
Are you the type of person that eases your way into the ocean, little by little or standing at the shore enjoying the beach? Or, are you all in? Diving into the water convincing yourself you will feel warmer by just diving in? Both of these ideas take some convincing of our own. Come on, just do it, or I wonder if there are shells!
Sometimes, the more I talk to myself, the more I stay at the shore not walking to take the plunge. Time and time again, I think to myself if someone fighting cancer can get up, show up and keep a positive attitude then I can do this! My Mom, even in her last months woke up with a purpose and never felt sorry for herself. It’s funny because prior to getting sick, my Mom never held a grudge or complained. Thinking back, I don’t think complaining was ever an option. The options were; if something is bothering you, make a change and if you can’t, change the way you think about it. In her words, stop talking about it and do something. Take action whether you are diving in or safe at the shore, see the beauty and believe in your thoughts and actions.
On this day, I give thanks and am so cheerful thinking back on the wonderful Mom I was granted. On this day, she entered her heavenly home way too soon, but her time on earth was so plentiful and continues to be as we carry her in our hearts. Roberta Elsie left her mark on many. An imprint that was everlasting with her loving, kind, understanding, honest, fun, down to earth spirit and so much more.
A good friend once told me when in doubt think about it, “what would Bert do?” Bert, never needed the spotlight, she worked hard and when in her presence you were met with joy and realism. She spoke the truth fairly, honestly and respectfully. Impeccably organized and impeccable with her word. Roberta could always be trusted and even if she was annoyed, you would never know, well maybe, sometimes I knew because she would say, ha “I need you to stop talking for just 5 minutes.” She never raised her voice in anger, but instead would tell you exactly how she felt and she was always right, sometimes so much so!
Bert, I’m grateful for August 2 because it reminds me of you and always leaves me with,”what would Bert do?” The answer that lingers is…. it is what it is and do the best you can and have faith everything works out for the best. We can’t control everything and everything happens for a reason. Don’t waste your time worrying, but do what you can and move on.
I think one of the best lessons I learned from my Mom’s cancer diagnosis is certainty of uncertainty. We may think we are certain; of our day, our life, our tasks, our joys, but I never knew how comfortable I was with uncertainty until I saw my Mom fight fearlessly with a positive attitude. The vessel of uncertainty fills with hope, faith and love for all that we have and acceptance of what it is within our control. Be certain that when faced with uncertainty you have the power within; your faith, hope, joy and love of life will sustain.
Back in March, I rededicate myself to wellness. It sounds a little like a baptism of some sort! I made a conscious effort to get to classes; spinning, bootcamp, zumba, yoga. The smorgasbord board of aerobic activity I’d say. There were days when I was at work thinking I don’t want too, but I remembered how good I felt when the class was over. Who really after working all day wants to plank, throw a tire or lift weights. The more consistent I got in doing classes, the easier and more enjoyable they are. What do “they” say it takes 21 days to create a habit. Well, I think it takes a lot more than that. I love the people I go with, location is convenient, the center is awesome, I feel great doing the classes and my workout clothes are comfy. It takes a lot more than 21 days. The discipline of getting to the gym grounds me. Make yourself a priority, it’s not selfish at all because you are investing in your future. Take it one plank at a time!