I’ve probably written about this before or maybe the lesson is just that good to share again because it resonates so deeply.
Grief, in hindsight, taught me many lessons and in reflection it still does, even when I least expect it too. Speak your truth, show how you feel and don’t apologize for speaking the truth in a loving way. People will never understand your situation until they are in it, they speculate, have an opinion, but never will have the clarity as being in the situation. Let others have their opinion, you don’t need ownership of that opinion, it’s theirs and certainly do not take it on. Falling victim to doubting ourselves is unproductive, absolutely, process your feeling and then let it go.
Keep your mouth shut, share your opinion when it’s asked, but sometimes value the differences in others and realize their opinion is most likely coming from a place of experience that has nothing to do with you. I learned this lesson as a child, I remember one of my Mom’s friends saying to my Mom as she gave me her look, “Jennifer, not now.” She’s so funny, she just says what we are all thinking, but don’t want to say. Needless to say, when I got home, my Mom reminded me that’s it’s always not appropriate to share what we are thinking, even if it’s true, time and place for everything.
Life is too short for nonsense and don’t take anything too seriously. Do your best and that’s all you can do, but don’t engage in the ignorance, laziness, stupidity of any situation, you are too good, rise to the situation and when you know better, you do better.