Pawn Stars disguised as Grief!

Little did I know or anyone, just months after my Mom’s passing I would become a pawn star, that’s right a pawn star. How did that happen?  I found myself in a smelly, dirty, pawn store that was a glow by flashing neon lights that read we “pay for gold.” Surely, I was not shopping or looking to trade in gold. I just felt so uncomfortable as I searched the display case looking for items, no not to buy, but that I was hopeful to recover in a pawn store. Items that were so near and dear of mine and my recently passed Mom, that I wasn’t even sure if I found them behind the dirty glass display case, I would want back. I was desperately searching for jewels, desperately! As I walked up and down jewelers row, it wasn’t about finding a deal. It was about recovering the little pieces of memories and tokens that were cherished memories of my Mom that were stolen. I was desperately searching pawn stores staring at gold chains, thinking, yes, that’s it, that’s the one my Mom wore. I left each store, saddened and disappointed. Didn’t these low life criminals know that it wasn’t just jewelery, they were our memories of our Mom, Wife and Friend.  I knew they didn’t care, but if I had the chance to tell them, I would. It was wrong.

Yes, I was really sad that items were stolen, but more saddened to the fact, that how dare someone strip us of our tangible, cherished memories and tokens of our Mom, Wife and Friend. They had no idea! After losing the most important person, these were replaceable items, yes, as I went in and out of pawn stores searching, it wasn’t the necklace, that I was hoping to find, it was the tangible memory.  Yes, they took  cherished items, but they couldn’t take our beautiful, vivid memories, but if I had the chance I would tell them, I would. It was wrong

A lot of times, I remember, my Mom would say, “yes, but it’s the principle, it shouldn’t happen.” That was exactly it, it was the principle, even though, they certainly didn’t steal our memories or joy.  I remember feeling  numb staring at gold chains, like I really didn’t care what was gone because what was most important was taken to heaven, my Mom.  Like everything I believe, there was a reason.   I truly believe, my Mom was an Angel on Earth and she is our Angel watching over her loved ones, friends and family.  It was truly sad to grieve for my Mom in a pawn store, jewelers row, detective’s office and  a police station, but it was just a mixture in all the grief of her passing.  I knew there would be more than just going in an out of pawn stores. It was the principle and it wasn’t ok.

It happened, tears came, when I recognized 5 items in the detectives ‘ s office that were mine and my Mom’s. I felt relieved, not because I got jewels returned and was ready to wear them, it wasn’t about that, it was reassurance I f faith. It happened, I had faith, that this too happened for a reason. In a short time after my Mom passed, it was a whisper that she was watching. I had faith and most importantly peace that all would be ok.

If  I had the chance I would tell them, I would. It was wrong. I did just that, in court, I had the chance and seized the moment, it was wrong and I told them, it was the principle. Little did they know, I had a guardian angel on the case!

Your loved one is with you, I truly believe, an Angel watching and protecting and maybe even laughing a lot along the way!

5 thoughts on “Pawn Stars disguised as Grief!

  1. Your mother must have been an amazing woman. I know that awful feeling of wandering through pawn shop after pawn shop looking for something to hold onto that belonged to a loved one. My son played the clarinet and someone stole his favorite one. I never found it. But, you are so right when you say our loved one is here with us. I feel him everyday.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ouch! How can people sink so low? But how beautiful to be in tune with that whisper of peace and assurance. You mother is honored by your diligence in looking, and standing on your principals. God Bless you.

    Liked by 1 person

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